milky hair

as you can see in the picture, there's a cat on the glass table, beside the pot (which you can just deny its existence and the fact why it is there). the cat is a girl, a mother indeed. that was her usual place to lepak with four of her kittens. and below the glass table there was a cat cage where i used to put her kittens.

the story was; she is a stray cat who gave birth inside my house which was conceived with either one of my cats. there were four cute little furballs, and we really wanted to have her kitties - well - to be part of the family as well. but the problem was the mama cat is afraid of humans. reallllllllly afraid of human. and this behavior inherited by all her four babies. the five of them would sneak into the house to eat or to use the sandbox or whatever and if kantoi with they would literally run like hell. she hid her babies behind our heaviest cupboard (i don't know how she did that). 

few months later her babies had grown up. do you remember how adorable to see little kitties chasing around and playing with each other? we really really wanted to play with them but they refused to have any human interaction. my mom personally hate the sight of something running fast towards under the sofa or elsewhere. they were very much ninja alike. but then the babies started to poo at the living room. and well that's my job to clean after them. but then my mom had enough of this and she decided to catch all the babies and put it in the cage.

the rational of her decision was because the mama cat didn't even taught her kids properly and that her house always stink of cat poo. at first, i taught well mom just want to put the babies inside the cage and that's all. so i break my bones just to catch all these cheeky little ninjas and put them inside a cage. then that evening when mom came home from work and look at the babies she said that we need to throw them away from the house. that really shocked me. they are just babies. how would they survived.

the next morning mom was serious about her decision. she told me to put the babies inside a cat carrier. i was fucking reluctant but then mom marah-marah and said just put them inside the carrier, i had enough with them. so i did. without the mother, mom drove the kittens to the pasar, that was really far from our house - that we need a car ride. in the car, i saw the babies were so small and frightened and shivering. i just couldn't come to do it so i said to mom that she's the one who should do the thing. 

so she did. she let go of the babies at the pasar. i saw four of them running as fast as they could to nowhere and that was the last time i saw my cute furballs. the most fuck up day i had. that night it was raining heavily. as i was on the bed thinking about how helpless the babies were, i heard the mama cat meow as she looked for her kids. it really broke my heart i broke down to tears. i was never angrier at mom like that night.

that morning i woke up greeted by my cat, the first thing i did was check on the mama cat whether she was still at our house. and as i looked, i saw her on the glass table exactly like in the picture, sleeping. i am not good at telling stories, but if you could just see the way she exhale, it seems like she was sobbing uncontrollably. she is still waiting for her kids to show up. she still meow every night (which drove my mom crazy). she is just a helpless cat.

i swear to God, that was the most horrible thing i ever done.